Lemmee Get This Straight Now......

You will no doubt notice that even if you run your mouse over these pictures and/or click to enlarge the blogspot way, none of them are going to reveal anything more than a shoulders-up shot of these women.

I am not only being a good boy, but I also want to make a point. And that is that it really isn't necessary to go hunt down the naked-celeb pics or even the willfully provocative, purposely-staged cheese shot to demonstrate that these women I am listing here are truly beautiful each in their own way. And that there isn't really any need to go for the tawdry snapshop to post here to make my point.

Nor am I going to post a link for all you neo-luddite cavemen out there. I'm just going to post four nice looking faces and that's really all we're going to need.

There is a famous poster most guys have seen in any gas station / tool shop / locker room / public men's room or whatever have you that I'm sure you boys have seen before. It depicts a stunningly gorgeous young woman dressed down revealing rounded curves, tightly perfect thighs, the bottom third of a taunting nipple peeking out below something that kind of looks like it might be clothes. Her legs are in a wide stance and she's in heels that must really hurt so her calf muscles are pouted out just so. Her hair goes wild across half her face and it looks for all the world as if it really is too warm where they are taking the picture and any minute now she's going to just rip everything off and go dive into the water that's behind her, waiting.

And across the bottom of the picture that takes up maybe 85% of the printed surface is a line, in quotes, that reads "Just remember, somebody somewhere has to put up with her shit."

And we get it. You know the one. We read it and nod ruefully. Because quite a few of us can vouch for the fact that we've either experienced personally, or at least have witnessed, the uber-chick acting like a total bitch to her date or boyfriend... every time they are ever seen in public... continually. Or else there are legendary stories about her impossible nature and egotistical disposition to the point of laughing at starving Ethiopian children while she hunts down her crack pipe. We know of the type, at least.

So it's one thing to put up pictures of beautiful women and enjoy them for what they are but we then usually sit back at some point - if the subject turns to it - and say "yeah, too difficult on the whole, so goodbye to that and no big whoop." And though there may be some truth to it we must also admit that this is a convenient cop-out because deep down inside we KNOW something like that isn't going to be bothered with something like... well... this. Either way we put it out of our mind, and justify the potential hardships as a good reason not to ever bother. Yeah right.

But just think for a second.

Halle Berry gets cheated on by a male model nobody ever heard of whose last name was probably G Washington something or other before he changed it and for all his ability to pose he certainly wasn't really all that. Tiger Woods cheated on Elin and I suppose you could say - yeah alright he's got billions of dollars and though he dressed like a forty-nine year old shlump he's got a game on. But he'd just be the exception that proved the rule because... Hugh Grant? After the fuckin eternally boyish British charms yadda yadda yadda you must see that he continually plays the exact same post-adolescent witty private school guy in every. last. movie. he. ever. did and couldn't act his way out of a paper bag. Besides which he dumps Elizabeth Hurley for a skanky hooker. I mean sweet bloody Jesus!

Now there's this Jesse James shithead or whatever the hell his name is. I have no fucking idea what he ever did in the world or why he's famous or why I should give a shit about his whatever career (I guess)... but he can't possibly have a smidgen's worth of cash in comparison to Sandra Bullock and - to be honest? - looking at him and who he ended up with on the left here is - I'd say - enough to give younger shlump versions of me hope. But... yeah... he dumped her. And he did it in favor of a girl with the ugliest mess of tattoo shit you'd ever want to see. And tattoos are so usual now - I mean - big deal... soccer moms have them for cry eye, so who are we crappin?

I heard a high school kid say "no tattoo is the new tattoo." Seriously. Change is the only constant... But I digress.

The thing is, even those of us who are happily married and couldn't imagine being with or doing things with anyone other than the generous and charitable (well, LOOK at us) people we have married must ask... you trade these in?

These are trade-ins? Dude. Excuse me but... lolwut?

Somewhere along the way I must have missed a memo. I thought these women could only make you look better. And I don't mean to say their beauty may circumvent a nasty, ugly, personal streak but COME ON.

The poster said "somebody has to put up with her shit.": It isn't saying "USED TO put up with her shit."

Now does it?